"Do vegans swallow?"

The other day, a great thought came to me. People are always asking, "Do vegans swallow?" basing this joke off the fact that sperm is technically animal byproduct. Funny, right? And they are always met with quizzical looks and, often, perverted comments. In other words, it usually falls pretty flat. As I meditated on this, the funniest response came to me. Thinking of it, I laughed out loud. I knew that next time someone asked me "Do vegans swallow?" I would quickly respond with this witty response, to be met with belly laughs from all within earshot.
Then, the next day, I forgot it. I completely forgot my own joke. Why hadn't I written it down?? Idiot! A friend and I brainstormed possible responses to no avail ("Like anyone is gonna suck you off anyway, FAG!") (...Was that inappropriate?).
Anyway, the joke was lost forever.

I want to remember. I want to remember everything. Unfortunately this is impossible for humans. The internet, however, can remember everything. And I'm not even asking for the whole internet, all I need is one page of it!
So, I'm going to put my life down here, in my own words, not so much how it actually happens, but how I would prefer to remember it. Because this is my page, I can do that.
Just consider this a second way of finding out about my going-ons. The first of course being direct contact with me. As a horrible liar, you will likely hear an accurate account of things that actually occur in my life.
The second way will be through this blog. The version of my life you read of will likely be overly-dramatic, sappy, and dare I say, "emo?" Don't get me wrong, being "emo" is certainly not my intent, but there is just something about Times New Roman that gives a certain weight to the phrase "my black heart" that often is unintended by the author! I feel that inability of most font families to express tone of voice is the source of so much internet angst. It is perhaps the reason so many people come off as "creepy" when they try and spark an innocent Pokemon debate in a chat room (Come on, tell me you didn't find most Pokemon strangely phallic!).
At any rate, I hope this blog is emo, and creepy, and everything a personal blog should be. Whatever it takes for me to remember my youth, so be it.

That is all for now,
Erin